We had not yet formulated the theory that there is an inverse relationship between full dining pleasure (especially the food selection) and proximity to water environments or heights above surrounding buildings. When is the last time you had a decent meal at any beach or bay? Think Newport, Laguna or Malibu.

Places like Bocaccio’s and its two immediate Westlake neighbors, plus Gladstone’s at the Beach, Duke’s, Moonshadow’s, The Occidental Tower  and that carousel of revolving restaurants  at Ventura and Oxnard harbors have since firmly reinforced the validity of the above premise.

Still, it took the original arrogant owner about 25 years to finally chase away most of his customers with over-sauced and overpriced  creamy pseudo Italian food served by haughty waiters whose goal seemingly was to prove that they knew more about food and wine than the diners. This was in spite of the fact that most of these waiters could not correctly pronounce the names of the food, nor the wine.

The restaurant was finally unloaded on an unsuspecting real estate “maven” who should have known better. His offices were in the Landing center. He decided to buy it for his most recent wife because she told him that she believed in healthy food and had just taken out a subscription for Gourmet magazine.

But they soon learned that, except for me, most of the previous term customers had died or existed on Social Security. Those that remained and were willing to pay those lakeside prices became furious when items such as Beef Wellington and well- done Prime Rib end cuts (Are they Italian?) were removed from the menu.

Then of course, there was the issue of no real executive chef combined with the fact that the owner, Jim Emmons was essentially an absentee manager. Boccacio’s on the lake was truly a ship without a rudder…..or even a sail.  Jim bailed out.

Along came the owner-management duo from the Landing (an immediate neighbor) and Milano’s in Agoura.. That certainly seemed to make sense. The long term Landing owner would provide onsite attention and Mama and Pappa Milano should certainly be able to deliver decent (perhaps even upscale Italian or Mediterranean) cooking to the lovely outdoor- indoor ambience (especially the renovated front garden room) that was still a main attraction. They even brought in the former executive chef from North Ranch. He was also a friend of the Landing owner. We knew him. 

As is our policy, we waited a bit more than three months before visiting Boccacio’s to do a review. Young Joseph Milano, the second generation restaurateur was the hands-on manager that evening. The menu seemed hardly changed. Prices seemed high for what was eventually served. It was a slow evening but the service was slower. We decided not to do the review and give the restaurant a bit more time to settle in.

The appetizers were not inspiring so we went safe. We each ordered a shrimp cocktail. There were5 plump and firm shrimp in each bowl. At $11.50 each, they seemed a bargain since we had just read the review on Sterling the latest in a line of phony steak houses in Hollywood and environs. It was serving shrimp at $3.50 each!!! Do the math.

The main menu was also prosaic and certainly did not bring any feeling of a potential dining adventure considering the lakeside prices. It was hard to determine the kitchen’s basic direction except that there was a section specifically devoted to red meat from the broiler. My wife ordered the ubiquitous and perhaps now somewhat boring Sea Bass (24.50). It was attractively plated and she reported that it was cooked perfectly.  

I was attracted to the only interesting item I saw on the menu. Paella!!! I love Paella. So without looking further at the description I ordered it. When it came to the table it was a plate of linguini with some tasteless shrimp, clams and scallops and fish. There was no rice, no sausage, no chicken, no spiciness. No Paella !!!!

I called the waiter over and told him that I thought I had been served the wrong dish. He told me that it was “Italian” Paella.  I suggested that the chef needed a geography lesson. In return for my advice the pleasant waiter then comped us for dessert which was a pleasant baked Alaska with a large slab of Spumoni. Another geographical conflict. But it was delicious. As we talked to the waiter over espresso, we learned that Khos, the executive chef from North Ranch was no longer on the premises. He was now cooking at a new restaurant opened by the Landing owner. It was in Simi Valley. Exactly why a former country club chef would move from Westlake to Simi Valley to cook was hard to comprehend. Perhaps we learned the answer.

As we were leaving we saw that private party being served dinner. They were all being served that newly discovered upscale dish …..steak cooked medium rare. . The steaks were all substantial in size, appeared to be cooked perfectly and extremely tempting.

No matter what any one tells you, it does not require an executive chef to satisfy the average steak eater. Just observe the action at places like OutBack and ClaimJumper where the meat is probably Choice at best. Maybe!!! The people in the kitchen at these places could easily be interchanged with the food preparers at PF Chang. The skills are about equal.

To move somewhat upscale, all that is really required is a good piece of Prime meat, Black Angus is a good start. Plus a hot broiler, a pair of tongs to turn the meat and an alarm stopwatch...  Thus, until Mastro’s opens next year, Boccacio’s may be the place for more serious diners to enjoy a pleasant steak dinner away from the thundering hordes. It’s a thought. 

Maybe that is what is in the mind of Joe Milano Jr. When we left the restaurant, he was still sitting at the same table…outside. He never came into the dining rooms to ask how the food was nor was he checking on the service.

Maybe Joe has visited Outback and ClaimJumper and figures steak eaters just don’t really pay attention to service.  When we first entered the very attractive dining room, we were taken to a table by a guy who was dressed like one of the busboys and acted like it. I think he also doubled as the bartender.

Boccacio’s    1234 Lindero Canyon at the Landing - Open for Lunch and Dinner
Most Credit Cards - Convenient Parking - Reservations Recommended
 

Frankly Noted

Lots happening in the Conejo Right Now  

Most diners that visit the popular Gino's Tratorria on Thousand Oaks Blvd West of the 23 think that owner Gino provides more than enough entertainment on his own. In fact some think he performs too much. But Gino apparently   fears no one.  He has announced that as of right now he is offering  live jockeyed Karaoke every Sunday evening. One will wonder whether he can resist joining in the singing. Let's hope that "Dat's Amore" is not on the play list.

Gino's serves the best classic Napolitano crisp thin crust Pizza in the county along with authentic Italian entrees at friendly neighborhood family prices. Gino's is a real place with down to earth atmosphere compared to the corporate cookie cutters that recently opened at The Lakes or is it The Puddles?

Serge Bonnet, the perpetual motion machine at Cafe Provencal reports that a new menu has now started with exciting takes on his always creative and well executed Bistro style French food at continually remarkable prices.  He is also now doing serious and upscale catering. His personality alone is worth the money.

Serge also reports that the Lakes has had an effect upon his shopping center as people who can't find parking across the street now park near his Cafe. That would be OK with him if they were real diners who would realize that they could have a wonderful lunch or dinner without a 2 hour wait at Cafe Provencal for pennies more than at the Lakes.

But most of them seem to be parents with youngsters licking ice cream cones that drip on the parking lot or they are in need of a glass of water or the bathroom.

Le Cafe appears to have completed the remodel of their facility that is part of the Westlake Inn complex. The weather is perfect right now for either a relaxed  afternoon lunch among the fountains and the ducks or a romantic evening under the stars. The menu is also being revamped after a recent change in the kitchen.

John Gress, formerly general manager of Le Cafe continues to work hard at bringing Le Rendezvous of Newbury Park into the 21st century. Calling it Tryst at Le Rendezvous is a provocative  start. He has done a limited amount of remodeling and is offering a new luncheon menu created by his chef from Hawaii who trained in Japan although she is neither Hawaiian nor Japanese. He has also replaced most of the servers with young ladies who won't need a cane to get the food to your table on time.

Most Wednesdays he has a fine jazz group playing in the bar and often combines that with interesting wine tasting and hors d'oeuvres  for $10. it is a great value and attracts a sophisticated young group who may have never before been inside Le Rendezvous.

As noted “The Lakes” finally opened with its latest Caruso inspired tribute to semi- fast food chain mediocrity. It is incredible to me that people would be willing to wait 1 ½ hours prox to eat PF Chang style Chinese food cooked and served by people that may not even know where China is located. The restaurant has nice statues of horses but the food is just a cut above the steam tables of Panda Express or the cans of La Choy. Barely.

ALL great and authentic Chinese, Japanese, Thai and Vietnamese Asian foods are served by the people of those countries. Period. There are many authentic family restaurants located in the Conejo that serve wonderful food with short or no waits. They deserve your support.  

What do your children learn about reality or authenticity in the world when they are served Asian food by young round eyed blonde girls and boys. Further it is cooked by some guy that didn’t know what a hot wok was 6 months ago? Your children  thus learn that anything can be faked........or frozen.

With all the great family Italian restaurants in the area, also actually owned by Italians,  why would one want to eat a mass produced pizza from a California Pizza that was started by 2  Beverly Hills(??) lawyers with no tastebuds? And wait an hour to get it? I don't get it!!!

I am not even going to comment on the advent of yet another cookie cutter steak house that offers a  grilled steak of suspect origin (certainly not Black Angus or Kobe) that requires no skills in a harried and annoying atmosphere that you can easily avoid  at home with a Martini or a beer in the relaxed environment of your patio.  How long do you have to wait there?

Of course the real laugher is that The Lakes management is currently shocked, I mean shocked to discover that some clever diners at these above joints who may also be going to a Civic Plaza event that evening leave their cars in the parking lot for most of the night  to avoid a $7 parking tab and 30 minutes inhaling the fumes while trying to escape the Plaza parking structure. A parking problem is already in existence at The Lakes and they are now talking about a multi story parking lot. Otherwise, I guess they will have to start towing the cars. Yikes!!!!

If aged prime steak is your real need, you will soon be able to dine at trendy Mastro’s of Beverly Hills (???)  in the old 2087 location across the street…. and safely leave your car parked free. It will, however  be interesting to see the looks of Conejoites when they see $40 price tags (or more) on most of the steaks with $8-10 tabs for any spinach, potato or onion ring side dish . Of course, they will be saving that $7 parking fee. . 

P-6 kept constantly touting itself as an upscale dining location in an exotic environment. It turned out to be a pickup joint for the tight leather pants crowd with lots of noise plus suspect food and service.

Now they announce that they will in fact redo themselves as that oft promised upscale dining facility but with a brand new serving and culinary team… all done instantaneously. This is certainly the century of “Instant Gratification”.

But the P-6 swingers can now do their seam busting strut and dancing at the sister Chapter 8 in Agoura in the remodeled Hamburger Hamlet location. So far at least they have made no claims about upscale dining.

It is amazing to me that in the Ventura County Star letters to the Editor as well as in various conversations, all our citizens constantly decry the loss of the reality of those relaxed good old traffic free uncrowded days in Thousand Oaks.

Yet given any opportunity, they flock to all  these  local crowded, noisy,  phony joints of the "dreaded" big city, wait an hour to get 35 minutes of food thrown at them by servers that don’t know the difference between a fork and a spoon. It's like dining at Wal-Mart.

Why not support your local and authentic neighborhood restaurants?. We have an abundance of every authentic ethnic spot in the Conejo. You’ll feel better about yourself when you do.  Prices are about the same. None of the wait people will have name tags telling you that their name is Tiffany and that they are at  your service.